Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Maintain a healthy level of insanity!

Something to think about in the New Year!

To maintain a healthy level of insanity:

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo field of all your checks, write "For Marijuana".
6. Skip down the hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.
7. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
8. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
9. Sing along at the opera.
10. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you have a headache.
11. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"
12. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling, "Run for your lives! They're loose!"

And the thirteenth and final way to keep a healthy level of insanity:

Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."


Anonymous said...

I got this in a e-mail once and loved it! Simply hilarious! :)
Love the intercom one!

Allison said...

I have a list like this, but mine is a list of 20. I love the last one especially!

Ahlaischa said...

This is sooo funny! It had my mom and I laughing for 20 minutes :-)

Kara said...

I ordered a diet water the other night...I couldn't keep a straight face though! ;)